Anniversary musings

I am feeling a bit better since the time of my last post. Not 100% myself but I am functioning. Lack of sleep, food, exercise and relaxation have set my whole system into a tailspin, but I am regrouping and will be back to full self soon.



I really wanted to post about my one year WW anniversary. So much has happened in the past year. As I have stated before, I decided last February that I would take a year to focus on myself - to stop being the one who always put everyone else first (husband, job, family, friends etc..) I told my husband that I would be making some selfish decisions. Financially I spent $$ on WW meetings, gym membership, fresh fruit in the middle of winter etc.. Except for rare occasions I have not let any 'bad' food into the house and have banned my trigger foods completely. I don't stop him from eating whatever he wants but I have made the selfish request for him to keep it out of the house. I have been selfish with my time as well. I have spent mornings at the gym, instead of lounging in bed with DH. I have gone to my WW meeting instead of coffee with girlfriends. I have spent evenings meal planning instead of curling up on the couch with my dog.



I think you get the picture. The crazy thing (to me at least) is that none of the people in my life have begrudged me for one minute. No one has felt slighted - instead they are proud of me and in some cases have joined me in this new selfish lifestyle. I have always heard the Dr. Phil/Oprah/Self-help book ideas that you have to be good to your self so that you can be good to others. I finally get it! I have had this major epiphany that seems so completely simple to me now that I have had it. I now treat myself how I have always treated other people. Wow, what a bomb shell!



In an ideal world I had hoped to be a little further to my goal by now. But considering how many times in the past 15 years I have said 'by this time next year I will be 50, 70, 100 pounds lighter and actually gained weight, I am ok with my progress. I have averaged just over 1lb a week. I have lost pretty consistently. It has not really been that hard, once I layed a few basic ground rules for myself, I just continually remind myself that I am worth it. These are the few things that are non-negotiables to me:



1. I never put anything in my mouth unless I have figured out (or approximated) the calories and fat grams. This does not always stop me from eating what I should not - but it usually makes me stop at one serving.



2. I plan out my menus for the week , including snacks, and I shop with a grocery list. I NEVER buy processed junk food at the grocery store. In the past year I have NEVER bought chips (unless they are baked) donuts, white bread, chocolate bars, candy, ice cream etc... I'm not saying that I have not eaten any of these things, they just do not come home with me from the grocery store. I stick to my list 100%



3. I weigh myself every day (I know this does not work for everyone). I find that If I hide from the scale it is too easy to pretend that everything is fine. Weighing everyday forces me to quickly recover from any slips.



4. When we eat out I have salad instead of fries. Seems simple? Well this is non-negotiable to me - I have not eaten a french fry in a year - and after this long I don't miss them at all! The fist few times were really hard, I felt sorry for myself - seemed so unfair! Now ordering a salad with my burger or sandwich is a little victory for me every time.



5. I never eat with out thinking. This one is hard to explain. I no longer grab something when I fill up with gas, or at the grocery checkout, or from the convenience store next to my work. This was a big downfall for me in the past - If I ate it quickly and on the run I never really had to consider that it was not good for me. By making it a non-negotiable promise to myself I have save thousands and thousands of un-needed calories.

6. I plan for mindless snacking. I know that I like to eat while watching tv in the evenings. I like to snack away on something crunchy. I have food on hand that takes a while to eat and is healthy. Home made pita chips and salsa, roasted chick peas, frozen home made applesauce are a few favourites. My absolute favourite is grapes - I can easily eat 4 cups of grapes (or more) in an evening so I plan for it. If I ever get the urge to really fill myself up (the comfort eating demon we all battle) now I turn to a huge bag of grapes - they fill me up fast and I never feel guilty afterwards.

So, those are a few of the things that have helped me be successful to this point, and these are the thing I will do to lose the next 35 pounds and maintain forever. This year I have discovered that I am much stronger than I gave myself credit for. Food is no longer my friend or enemy - it is fuel for my body and my body deserves the best!

Thanks for reading.